You ever wonder why the world is hurting so much? Or why there are many who don't have a purpose or something to live for? Or why there are so many who put on masks to "prove" that they've got everything in control of and that they can deal with things on their own? Let me tell you why....
I walk around at OC a lot alone with my earphones on with no music going... I do it so I can hear my surroundings. Last night, I look at everyone with eye contact. and I was getting really frustrated with everyone I made eye contact with. I didn't know why I was getting sad and frustrated. Why was every one putting on a smile when I know that deep down they were hurting or had something in their lives that was holding them back. A few people I came in contact with I asked if they were okay. or how there day was going and with their whisper voice they said "I'm fine, how are you?" "Today is great" REALLY?
So, While I'm walking back to my room, I decided to sit by the beautiful clock tower OC has. When I sat down I took a deep breathe and my tears started rolling down my face and then the wind started to blow for about 5 seconds and for some reason, the light bulb went off. I knew why. It's because I see more of the church impacting the church, instead of the church impacting the world.
I opened up my bible for some odd reason and the first thing I seriously open up to and read was
Nehemiah 1: 4 which says "When I heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven."
When I read this I asked myself what ever happened to Deep pain and sorrow in the church?
Nehemiah shared his own pain and sorrows for what God saw happening to his church and his people.
Satan has told me my whole life to fight it out...alone. So I wouldn't weep before God or others. So, I wouldn't share my pain and sorrow to others. When I fought on my own, I became more empty. How Lame is it that I listened to him for years. But, No more does he have a hold of me. I only realized that there is going to be no renewal, or awakening until we let God break us down.
PEOPLE: Can we please start getting SErious about our purpose in this world? It's getting late.
Father, If there is anyone that's reading this blog, and they feel so empty and is longing for that one missing piece in their hearts, I pray that they aren't afraid to talk to You or me or anyone else about it. Knowing you and living for you has been the best thing that I can ever imagine. There is nothing...NOTHING physical that will give you 100% fulfillment.
So Today Christ followers, Do not hold back from what our Lord needs (us) to do. "Don't be afraid to get your hands dirty" as my Friend Natalie Goens told me. Take a Leap of Faith if you have to. The church isn't a building, its a family. Through thick and thin. The church encourages. SEes through God's eyes. Serves. and Loves. and while we do all of this... The Glory is FOREVER God's! :)
Break my heart for what breaks yours, Father. -Amen
Mark 10:45 - "For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” (How Humbling)
Wow. Emily.
ReplyDeleteYou are a special person, and I am so thankful to know you.
Sister, you have articulated very well something that has been heart and might for quite some time. I think you are absolutely right - that the church does spend a lot of resrouces (time, money, etc.) toward impacting itself than on those who have never heard His name. I want to be part of the solution and am praying for His wisdom and boldness to do just that.
ReplyDeleteLove you and am so grateful that you share your gift.